ABOUT EXISTENTIAL KINK

Existential Kink: Unmask Your Shadow and Embrace Your Power (A method for getting what you want by getting off on what you don't)

A smart, sexy guide to embracing the repressed, tabooed, and often unwanted aspects of ourselves so we can discover our inner power and finally live the life we deserve.

“We always get exactly what we want; but often, though we may not be aware of it, what we most want is dark—very dark.”

Each of us has a dual nature: we are light (conscious) and dark (unconscious). The dark side of our personality—the “other,” the shadow side—is made up of what we think is our primitive, primal, negative impulses—our “existential kink.” Our existential kink also drives the dark or negative repeating patterns in our life: always choosing the abusive partner or boss, settling for less, thinking that we’re undeserving, not worthy. But it also is the source of our greatest power.

In Existential Kink, Carolyn Elliot, PhD, offers a truth-telling guide for bringing our shadow into the light. Inviting us to make conscious the unconscious, Elliot asks us to own the subconscious pleasure we get from the stuck, painful patterns of our existence.

Existential Kink provides practical advice and meditations so we truly see our shadow side’s “guilty pleasures,” love and accept them, and integrate them into our whole being. By doing so, Elliot shows, we bring to life the raw, hot, glorious power we all have to get what we really want in our lives.

“In a year of practicing Existential Kink, my entire life has shifted tremendously. I have more confidence, less anxiety, and more joy in life. I feel powerful, because I recognize how my desires – conscious or not – are being fulfilled every moment!”

Sheryl Miller

“Existential Kink brought out my love of feeling unwanted and victimized which I was able to get off on and then soon after a few sessions the anxiety started to wane. After a couple of weeks I started getting recognition for all kinds of work and now everyone is telling me how much the boss loves me. My team has grown, giving me more resources to handle the workload. My confidence is high and I am now able to properly think about my work and get great results and enjoy the experience of my career.”

Michelle Bradley

“Carolyn’s method of shadow work takes what has always been a harrowing act of bravery, shadow work, and makes it deeply pleasurable as well. This makes me actually desire to do the work! And as such, I’ve accomplished more, integrated more, than at any earlier period of my life. Which is to say that I feel more grounded and liberated than I have since I was a child.”

Maggie Spade

“I was feeling disconnected in my relationships. Although I’d created the relationships (both friendship and romantic) I wanted, I wasn’t able to fully connect intimately within them. I felt distant and removed. Practicing Existential Kink, particularly around romantic and sexual patterns, completely transformed all of my close relationships and has allowed me to connect on significantly deeper, truer levels.”

Anita Billings

“Existential Kink helped me enjoy myself a lot more and give meaning to life, or even more meaning to life than I will ever understand and especially the fun factor of it – it’s exciting and juicy fun.”

Marion Cardamone

“This work has helped me find profound peace.”

Holly Kiefer

“I admit that I am still learning to celebrate and ‘get off’ on the f*ck-ups instead of the old knee-jerk reaction of disappointment. It’s definitely a mind-twister but OH MY GOD it such an exponentially more fun and fulfilling way to go through life!”

Michelle Lewis

“Shadow integration made practical and completely understandable. NO one else explains shadow integration in such a way that it makes solid sense. It can be so difficult to embrace parts of your being that you’ve been rejecting your entire life let alone see those parts. But I LOVE that Carolyn finds a way to poetically and articulately explain why it’s so important AND that she teaches HOW to do it in simple stages!”

Akhera Unpa Shepsutera